On this week’s episode of a Healthy Push podcast, I was joined by former Panic to Peace student, Zoe!
Zoe took my program in January of 2023. It was so nice catching up with Zoe! Together we discussed how her anxiety presented itself, when she sought help, what worked in her recovery and how things are going now.
Zoe’s Introduction to Anxiety…
I first wanted to understand and refresh a little bit about Zoe’s history with anxiety. “I think I’ve had it in some variation for my whole life”, she explains. And when college came around, Zoe’s anxiety started intensifying. In an attempt to figure out what was going on, Zoe was diagnosed with OCD and general anxiety disorder. OCD can present in several different forms (obsessions vs. compulsions), and Zoe explains that for her, it was more thought-based (obsessions). She would ruminate and overthink about seemingly everything, second guessing her actions, all stemming from an overwhelming feeling of “wanting to good/the right thing”.
OCD (Obsessions): Persistent, intrusive, and unwanted thoughts/images that cause significant distress.
OCD (Compulsions): Repetitive behaviors or mental acts performed to reduce the anxiety caused by the obsessions.
Enter Panic…
While her anxiety and OCD were gradually consuming her day to day life throughout her college years, it wasn’t until after college that Zoe experienced a full blown panic attack for the first time. She goes onto explain that this anxiety was much “louder” than her past experiences with it. She remembers being in an IKEA, shopping for new furniture, when she started feeling some common symptoms associated with panic attacks, including: feeling hot/sweaty, feeling trapped (I have to leave now!), and nausea. It’s worth mentioning that Zoe was in IKEA shopping for her new apartment. Although it’s not a guarantee, major life changes such as moving can often trigger and amplify anxiety and panic disorders.
What Next?
Well, Zoe had officially added panic to the mix. I was curious to hear what her next steps were, and how these new feelings of panic affected her. She explains that she started setting limitations for herself, in an attempt to avoid feelings of panic altogether. She found herself avoiding large, public spaces, even resorting to getting her groceries delivered straight to her apartment. And when she did have an unavoidable situation where she had to be somewhere, she would find herself creating escape routes in her head, so that she could remove herself from the setting (and potential feelings of panic) as soon as possible.
She also displayed another common coping mechanism, carrying around “safety items”. No matter the situation, Zoe had to have water, mints, gum, a sweater etc. While Zoe found comfort in having these things with her, as she looks back (and as you’ve heard me discuss many times!), she was essentially feeding her fear.
Panic to Peace
It was around this time (2023) that Zoe started really began seeking support and help with her anxiety and panic, and stumbled upon my Panic to Peace program. And I was so thrilled to hear that some of the applications she learned in the program had a profound impact on her recovery. Two major aspects of the program she points to are “taking small steps” and “surrendering to the feelings of your anxiety”. It was during this time that Zoe was finally in a place to start rationally analyzing and addressing her anxiety, and started uncovering some of the potential causes.
She explains that over the years, Zoe felt as if her anxiety was trying to tell her something was wrong, but felt overwhelmed and unsupported in her journey. She had a ton going on in her personal life, including a long-term break up. It turns out, the relationship that had ended had been a huge driving force in Zoe’s anxiety, she just hadn’t fully realized it until she was in a space to start evaluating her life and her relationships. This is extremely common, and can’t tell you how many students I’ve had tell me this. When Zoe finally arrived at this conclusion, it was a huge turning point in her journey/recovery.
Update…
So, how are things going now? Almost 2 years removed from her completion of Panic to Peace, I was so happy to hear that Zoe’s life is the best it’s been in years. She started a new relationship, has been traveling whenever she can, and has felt more and more comfortable putting herself out there.
As far as what Zoe would suggest to someone experiencing anxiety and panic: take small steps, and know that you’re not alone.
“Recovery is not my anxiety is totally gone, it’s just improved. It’s there, but it’s not in the loud, overwhelming form”.
Been curious about my Panic to Peace program? Check it out here. And be sure to jump on the waiting list so that you're the first to know when doors open again!
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